Sending Him Off

Yesterday morning I drove the boy to church and dropped him off. The youth went to Snowbird Wilderness Outfitters, in the mountains, for a week of missions work, bible study and white water fun. I was surprised at how much I wanted to cry when I was driving away. I also wanted to give him a great big bear hug before I left, but I just settled for a half-hug from the side. Bonnie, the youth leader, could tell that I was barely holding it together and gave me a hug. She told me that he would be fine. I knew he would be fine, the problem was would "I" be fine? The whole time our children are little we seem to want them to reach this milestone, or that milestone. The next thing you know they are 13 and never home. I had a flash of the future....the boys going on this adventure or that adventure and Landon and I waving bye as they drive away. It makes me want to treasure each and every moment that we have with them right now. Levi only has five more years of mandatory schooling and then he could be gone to college or out on his own. It all seems so short now. I remember that in the toddler phase every week was like a year.......and now every month is like a day. Literally, a blink of an eye.